


saint bernard

by damienkarras



Category: The Umbrella Academy (Comics), The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Adopted Children, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Anxiety, Before Reginald's death, Bisexual Klaus Hargreeves, Bisexual Male Character, Child Abandonment, Child Neglect, Childhood Trauma, Cigarettes, Drug Addiction, Drug Use, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Ghosts, Good Parent Grace Hargreeves, Good Sister Allison Hargreeves, Good Sister Vanya Hargreeves, Hurt Diego Hargreeves, Hurt Klaus Hargreeves, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, It Gets Worse Before It Gets Better, No Incest, Other, Paranormal, Past Relationship(s), Platonic Cuddling, Platonic Female/Male Relationships, Platonic Relationships, Prime 8's, Protective Diego Hargreeves, Protective Klaus Hargreeves, Punk Diego, Punk Vanya, Recreational Drug Use, References to Depression, References to Drugs, Reginald Hargreeves' A+ Parenting, Religion, Sibling Bonding, Sibling Rivalry, Spoilers, Vanya Hargreeves Deserves Better, everyone is 16-17, im just shitting
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-28
Updated: 2019-10-27
Packaged: 2021-01-04 17:49:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 731
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21201638
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/damienkarras/pseuds/damienkarras
Summary: there's really just one thing we have in common /neither of us will be missed.the kids struggle with mortality.





	saint bernard

**Author's Note:**

> https://open.spotify.com/playlist/6UX7rIKOlKrmsz1ktnWbjL
> 
> playlist for this fic.

The smell of salt and brine, the slow creak of wooden and worn boats dancing on the moving sea, and the sound of seagulls and the crashing waves is what ties this all together, he thought-- and what freedom it gave him that he otherwise would be robbed of, with taut muscles and the stench of blood. The pier bent under his weight, evidence of water damage and its history. This pier had been there since he was born, since his father would visit this place with them, put them through grueling practice-- but he’d always notice the beauty of this place, even under the water, fifty feet below. 

He stood at the edge of the pier, taking in the sights and sounds. This was the last night of his freedom, until his father figured out what he’d done. He wouldn’t be able to come back to this place in months, and he wasn’t sure he could live with it, but he’d try. Taking a deep breath, he backed up, then knelt to touch the water’s surface. It rippled, and he dove headfirst into the sea.

The building had been abandoned for ages, yet still stood proudly in the middle of town. This was were Klaus took his solace tonight, air thick with cigarette smoke and the occasional chatter of a car speeding down the road. He put the cigarette to his lips, taking a moment to trace out the lights that shone over the city.

The door that led up to the roof swung open, and much to Klaus’s surprise, Vanya stumbled over.

“Got a light?”

“You look drunk,” he commented.

“I’m tired.” Klaus produced his favorite lighter from his pocket and Vanya snatched the cigarette behind his ear, quickly lighting it.

“How was the gig?”

“Diego didn’t bother to show up,” she muttered. “We had to go up without him.”

“How did that work out?”

“Do the math.” She lowered herself down to sit at the edge beside Klaus, staring down. Klaus could see she was tired, even more than him.

“We should get home,” he said, putting his hand on her shoulder. “Vanya, you look like death.”

“I could say the same for you.” She glanced up, only moving to take the cigarette out of her mouth. “I’m pissed at Diego. He said he would commit to this band, man. All of the sudden he acts like his priority is to be better than Luther.”

“He is competitive.”

She scoffed. “We’re going nowhere without him. Peabody’s pissed at him too, but I doubt we’ll get him to stay.”

“Why don’t you sleep on this, Van?” Truth be told, Klaus was drifting off too, and he didn’t want Vanya to start getting angry. “You can sleep in my room, if you want.”

"I'm fine," she reassured him. "I'm just pissed. Let's go home. Is the old man asleep?"

"Like always," Klaus muttered, and they started to descend the stairs. 

"You ever think about getting out of here?"

"Always. But I never act on it-- it just seems futile, you know? Escaping when you know you'll be caught."

The rest of the walk was quiet.

"I need to sleep. We're training tomorrow." Klaus started to jog, reaching the mansion way before Vanya, but waited for her. They opened the doors, quickly sneaking upstairs.

"Night, Klaus."

When he was alone in his room, he sighed. His heart hung heavy with the secrets he was keeping within, and the fact he almost told Vanya made it worse. He shut off his lights, but not before he shoved some pills in his mouth, arching his head back and swallowing them dry. 

"Fuck," he mumbled. "Fuck. Fuck." Klaus sat on his bed, dragging his hands across his face. It was apparent he was not looking forward to the training, especially when his limbs were sore and the smell of blood still lingered. He never was a good hero, no matter how hard he tried-- it was always somebody else who saved the day, and most likely it was Luther. He could hear Allison pacing in the room next to his, and for a second he let himself get lost in her rhythmic footsteps, but they soon stopped, and he was forced to listen to the silence again. If only he could leave.

"If only," he whispered, and the house whispered with him. "If only." 


End file.
